Duh! This Saying Makes Children Have a “Beggar” Mentality during Eid al-Fitr
Windowofworld.com – Giving gifts for Eid al-Fitr or often referred to as “THR” to children using a picture envelope is one of the traditions that has been done a long time ago.
Usually children will get THR from relatives or close relatives who are adults and work.
This tradition actually has a good meaning because it teaches children to share with each other.
However, sometimes in the middle of giving THR, parents unconsciously like to teach their children to be “begging” individuals.
This is what must be avoided, Ma!
What makes children have a begging spirit comes from asking for a gift for Eid or THR.
Sometimes there are parents who deliberately ask for THR in advance from colleagues or other family members on the grounds for their child. Meanwhile, children usually just obey what their parents say.
However, it should be noted that it is likely that what Mama and Papa do will be emulated by the children.
So it does not rule out the possibility that in the future he will become a person who usually begs.
So that this bad thing does not happen to mama’s child, hereinafter Popmama.com has summarized some things that parents need to avoid so that children do not have “beggar spirit”.
Come on, Mom!
1. Wrong sentence from parents
Usually, giving out Lebaran or THR prizes is done at the same time as a halalbihalal event.
This is the time for parents to be careful in speaking.
Avoid a few sentences that accidentally make a child have a beggar spirit, as follows:
- “Look, there’s an aunt coming, salim first there so you can get money”
- “Auntie, her nephew wants to be salim. Where is THR aunt for her niece.”
- “The niece’s aunt has come all the way, how long has it not been given the THR”
- “Auntie already working will definitely get the THR, for her niece”
- “Tante already gave it, why don’t you give THR to her nephew?”
- “Come on, take halalbihalal to Mama’s friend’s house. She’s a rich person, you know, when you go there, you will definitely be given money.”
- “Son, Uncle wants to go home! If you salim, you will be given money, you know”
The sentence above needs to be avoided from coming out of the mouth of the parents because if it is spoken it will make the child have the soul to beg from other people one day.
The child will record these words and behaviors, so maybe one day he will beg for money from other people.
So, let’s stop saying those things!
2. Hadiths and verses of the Koran that parents need to know
In essence, having a begging soul is strictly prohibited in Islamic teachings. This is stated in the following hadiths:
“Whoever begs for money even though he is not destitute, it is as if he is eating hot coals” (HR Ahmad 4/165)
In another hadith it is also stated that whoever begs will have no flesh on his face on the Day of Resurrection.
Narrated from ‘Abdullah bin’ Umar Radhiyallahu ‘Anhuma, he said: Rasulullah Sallallahu’ Alaihi Wasallam said:
“A person is always begging others (begging) so that he will come on the Day of Judgment with not a piece of flesh on his face.” (Muttafaq ‘Alaih)
A person who begs is the same as asking for coals of fire.
“Whoever begs for other people’s property to enrich himself, is actually only asking for coals of fire. Therefore, please ask for a little or a lot. “ (HR. Muslim)
However, begging is permitted when someone is in three situations, namely having a debt, someone who is suffering from misfortune, and someone who is afflicted with life.
Narrated from the Friend of Qabishah bin Mukhariq Al-Hilali radhiyallahu ‘anhu, he said:
The Messenger of Allah -peace and prayer of Allah be upon him- said: “O Qabishah! In fact, begging is not lawful, except for one of three people: A person who bears a burden (someone else’s debt, diyat / fine), he may beg until he repays it, then stops. And someone who is stricken by an accident that consumes his wealth, he may beg until he gets a living support. And someone who is stricken with life’s misery so that there are three wise people from his people who say, “The so-called has been afflicted with life,” he may beg until he gets life support. Begging for other than those three things, O Qabishah! It is haram, and those who eat it eat what is unclean.
3. Involve children in charity
So that the child does not have a beggar mentality, it is better to teach him to do good deeds, Ma. One of the ways you can do this is by involving your children when doing charity activities. This is in order to show directly that both parents are really doing charity, not just giving theories.
Examples of charity activities that can involve children are sharing used toys and clothes that are suitable for use with others. Because they do not have an income, children can do good by using the things they have.
Ask the mama’s children to choose the clothes and toys they want to donate. After the children have put away the toys and clothes, take the children to the donation post to give the items.
Another example, Mama can invite children when paying zakat. Tithe is a charity activity that is rarely known to people. This is because someone who pays zakat is directly dealing with amil zakat. For this reason, inviting children when mama pays their testicles is a good momentum to add references to charity activities in the eyes of children.
4. The benefits of teaching children to do good from childhood
By doing charity activities, it means that Mama and the children have done useful activities for others.
However, besides having an impact on the recipient, charity also has an impact on the giver, you know, Ma!
Well, here are some of the benefits that can be obtained from teaching children to do good deeds:
- Make children feel involved and connected to the environment or world outside of themselves.
- Feel happy when you know that your gift is beneficial to others.
- Have positive feelings and views about yourself and others.
- Help find meaning and purpose in living life.
- Charity can also make children feel happy because they feel they are able to play a role and make other people’s conditions better with what they do.
- Helping to improve the social life in children.
So, those are the things that Mama and Papa should avoid so that they don’t teach their children to have a beggar spirit.
Children are allowed to receive THR money from relatives and close relatives, but don’t ask for it, yes.
Don’t forget to remind the child to say thank you and smile when given THR. The spirit continues to educate children, Ma!